Are You Considering Divorce?
Stop Feeling Stuck In Your Marriage
Marriage is difficult, and sometimes the pain is so high that you might think the only option is to get out. Before considering divorce as the only option, get the right help you both deserve. The truth is that most couples really are compatible, but they just lack the skills to have a happy marriage.
Should I Get A Divorce?
Before asking if you should get a divorce, ask yourself what would need to change to stay married. About 40% of couples report they regretted their divorce, and that number jumps to 80% after an affair. This is because most of those couples realized later they were stuck in a negative cycle and they just wanted to have a peaceful marriage, but they didn’t know how.
We Are Waiting Until The Kids Are 18
Waiting to get a divorce until your kids are 18 is generally a bad idea. Happy and cooperative divorced parents are much healthier for children than depressed or angry adults that continue to torment each other. The best way to support your kids is to get help and make a decision about your marriage. Divorce doesn’t hurt kids, but anger and resentment will.
I Don't Believe In Divorce
Sometimes one spouse is considering divorce, but the other doesn’t see that as an option. It’s important to understand that you are making a decision that impacts you and the entire family. You have a choice: you can work on improving the marriage, or you can live with the status quo. You both get a vote, and you both have power to make the decision.
I'm Considering A Divorce, But I'm Scared
Thinking about such a big life decision is extremely daunting and scary. When I work with couples contemplating divorce, I often tell them to focus on the relationship first. Work on your daily interactions, create a positive emotional connection, and address or repair any underlying issues that must be addressed. Especially if you have kids, you will always have a relationship together. We can address the question about compatibility after working on your relationship skills.
Your Next Step Is A Couples Retreat
If you are ready for professional support, it is time to consider a private couples therapy retreat. Retreats are a 1-4 day program where you have the opportunity to learn skills that can either help you heal your marriage or make a decision about your future together.